Bullying is never okay, and in the life of a believer of Jesus Christ, it is even more so, not okay. Any Christian that attempts to justify or condone bullying needs to check their faith. I'm writing this as a lifelong victim of bullying. Perhaps, this might me some of the strongest and hardest words I might have to write on a subject too long not addressed by the Church, but there are things that need to be said, both based on my experiences and what the Bible says about bullying.
What is bullying? Bullying, in my opinion (and experience), is pushing and putting down others, through various means, to lift oneself up, both in their own eyes and the eyes of others, without care for the other person. We see it in all aspects of our society, all the way to the current President, who gets a free pass because of the bullying that he receives. But is bullying in return justified, especially when the bully in question has a lifelong habit of bullying before all this. No, I'm not going to spend much time on the President's character issues, but am using him as an example of Christians that support the President justifying bullying.
Growing up was often difficult, as I was short (pun intended). The doctors said I might not reach 5' tall. I'm not 5'8", so what do doctors know. Kids tend to be cruel, even Christian kids, especially if not taught well. Name-calling, pushing, hitting, threats, etc. were part of daily life going to school in the 1980's and early '90s. Kids would bully other kids, including me, during the week, and go to church on Sunday, after partying on Friday and Saturday nights, acting like it was all okay. Then again, that's Southern culture for you. Typically, if you grew up in the South, went to church, was baptized, all was okay. It's still that way.
Now perhaps, an argument can be made that people should stand up for themselves. Push back, so to speak. But is that really the Christian response?
30 let him give his cheek to the one who strikes, and let him be filled with insults.
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (La 3:30). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ 39 But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41 And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (Mt 5:38–42). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.
That's not to say that we should let people walk over us, but if Lamentations speaks of being struck on the cheek, and it appears that Jesus is quoting Lamentations in making the point of not taking revenge on those who would do us harm, then should we push back as hard or harder than given? That should be a solid no.
What are some effects of bullying on a person? We've seen this in culture, often with school shootings. The loner kid, dressed all in black, bullied for being different, is stockpiling guns and bomb-making equipment in his garage, seemingly without his parents' knowledge, and then shoots up a school. That's not to say that he is justified in his actions, because clearly he is not. What if someone else stood up fro him in the face of the bullies? What if someone had reached out to him and been friends with him? What if a true Christian had shared Christ with him?
Other effects might be depression, suicide, loneliness, addictions, etc. Bullying hurts a person down to the core. It makes them feel less than worthless and so they seek out other avenues of escape which are just as harmful and can lead to lifelong addictions. Their relationships suffer, perhaps even longterm. They might have trouble having friends, and even opening up to others.
Are there any solutions to this crisis? The obvious one is don't be a bully. The next obvious one is to trust in Christ. Find your identity in Christ. Maybe this sounds trite, but if you have been a victim of bullying, don't let it define you. Words are just words, and the bullies have their own issues they likely need to deal with, and God will deal with them in time. If you are a bully, or have bullied others, it's time to stop it and turn to Christ. Seek out those you have harmed and ask forgiveness. Bullying is an ugly sin that has no place in a Christian's life.
In conclusion, Christ himself did not strike back when the accusations flew against him. The officers of the court struck him and he asked why. They had nothing against him, and yet felt threatened because of their own pride and power, even though Jesus simply brought them the Gospel. That's what is needed. The Gospel.
